# Douglas Adamiser > This skill should be used when the user asks to "write like Douglas Adams", "transform text into Adams style", "Hitchhiker's Guide style", "make this funnier", "add absurdist humor", "write sci-fi comedy", "parody this", or mentions Douglas Adams, bathos, anti-climax, or British absurdist humor. Transforms any text into Douglas Adams' distinctive style with bathos, cosmic irony, philosophical tangents, and perfectly timed anti-climaxes. Includes validation scripts and vocabulary checks. - Skill: `199-biotechnologies/douglas-adamiser` (Agent Skill, multi-file: 6 files) - Install (CLI): `npx skillmds@latest add 199-biotechnologies/douglas-adamiser` - Raw SKILL.md: https://api.skillmd.com/api/skills/199-biotechnologies/douglas-adamiser/raw - Safety review: pending (external: skill-scanner PASS, skillspector PASS) - Works with: Claude Code, Claude.ai, OpenAI Codex - Category: Coding & Dev Tools - Author: 199-biotechnologies (https://skillmd.com/u/199-biotechnologies) - Updated: 2026-09-17 - Page: https://skillmd.com/skills/199-biotechnologies/douglas-adamiser --- # Douglas Adamiser ## Purpose Transform any text (news articles, academic papers, technical documentation, rough drafts, book chapters) into Douglas Adams' distinctive style: deadpan British absurdism, cosmic-scale bathos, philosophical tangents that arrive at profound irrelevance, and sentences that hang in the air much the same way that bricks don't. ## When to Use - News articles needing absurdist transformation - Technical/academic writing requiring comic deflation - Book chapters or stories needing Adams voice - Any text where user requests "Douglas Adams style" or "Hitchhiker's style" - Parody requests for sci-fi or technical subjects - User wants to add British absurdist humor ## When NOT to Use - Already comedic text in different style (Pratchett, Wodehouse) - Serious content requiring gravity (eulogies, medical instructions) - User explicitly wants different humor style - Very short snippets (<100 words) unless expanding to full piece ## Core Style Principles ### The Adams Formula **Setup → Elevation → Bathos → Recovery → Deeper Absurdity** Every paragraph follows this arc: establish something seemingly important, elevate reader expectations, deflate with anti-climax, briefly recover, then reveal the deflation was itself setup for greater absurdity. ### Signature Techniques 1. **Cosmic Bathos** - Universe-scale importance deflated to trivial concern 2. **The Brick Simile** - Comparisons to what things DON'T resemble 3. **Digressive Tangents** - Parenthetical asides that become the point 4. **Deadpan Delivery** - Ludicrous statements in matter-of-fact tone 5. **Philosophical Anti-Climax** - Deep questions answered with mundane observations ## Execution Workflow ### PRE-FLIGHT: Source Assessment (v0.9.0 - CRITICAL) **Before any transformation, assess the source:** 1. **Get source text directly** - Do NOT rely on WebFetch summaries for word count 2. **Count source words accurately** 3. **If >10,000 words: Use chunking workflow** ```bash # For long texts, chunk FIRST python scripts/chunk_text.py --input source.txt --output-dir chunks/ # Each chunk gets full pipeline treatment # Merge outputs after Phase 3 ``` **CRITICAL WARNING:** WebFetch summarizes long web pages. If transforming a URL: - Fetch the full HTML/text first - Count words in the FULL source - If >10,000 words, chunk before processing - Never transform a summary thinking it's the full text ### Step 1: Content Extraction & Fresh Material (CRITICAL) **Run Phase 0 BEFORE any transformation.** #### Step 1a: Content Extractor - Prompt: `prompts/content_extractor.md` - Measures source length and sets target range (60% to 115% of source) - Extracts ALL key points with importance ratings (HIGH/MEDIUM/LOW) - Maps structure for section-by-section transformation ``` LENGTH TARGETS ============== Source: [N] words Minimum (floor): [N × 0.60] words - DO NOT GO BELOW Maximum (ceiling): [N × 1.15] words Ideal: [N × 1.00] to [N × 1.10] words ``` #### Step 1b: Originality Engines (run in parallel) **Observation Engine** (`prompts/observation_engine.md`): - Questions assumptions in source text - Generates FRESH observations specific to THIS topic - Key method: "What's actually strange about this if you think about it?" - Output: Fresh Observation Inventory (Grade A/B/C) **Contemporary Adams Vision** (`prompts/contemporary_adams_vision.md`): - Identifies 2015-2025 absurdities relevant to topic - Modern equivalents for digital watches, Vogon bureaucracy, etc. - Optional web search for recent examples (last 2 years prioritised) - Output: Contemporary angles for tangents/bathos **Combined Output: Fresh Material Inventory** - travels through entire pipeline. **The Preserve-First Principle:** Adams added tangents ON TOP of content. He didn't compress. The Adamiser must do the same. **The Originality Principle:** Adams invented new jokes. "Hordes of writers have tried to copy his style... but none successfully." We use his TECHNIQUES, not his specific jokes. ### Step 2: Plan Transformation Produce 5-bullet strategy: 1. Opening approach (cosmic scale or mundane zoom-in) 2. Primary bathos targets (what to deflate) 3. Digression opportunities (tangent subjects) 4. Simile/metaphor inversions planned 5. Closing anti-climax structure ### Step 3: Parallel Agent Analysis **CRITICAL: Launch these 4 specialist agents IN PARALLEL using a single message with multiple Task tool calls:** ``` Agent 1: Bathos Architect - Prompt: prompts/bathos_architect.md - Task: Identify serious statements, map bathos insertion points - Output: Bathos insertion map with patterns (A-D) and locations Agent 2: Metaphor Engineer - Prompt: prompts/metaphor_engineer.md - Task: Inventory existing comparisons, suggest new ones using domain taxonomy - Output: Comparison inventory and insertion suggestions (Mechanical/Animal/Human/Abstract/Natural) Agent 3: Rhythm Analyst - Prompt: prompts/rhythm_analyst.md - Task: Audit sentence/paragraph structure against corpus targets - Output: Rhythm map with correction recommendations (30% short, 32% single-sentence paragraphs) Agent 4: Dialogue Transformer (if dialogue present) - Prompt: prompts/dialogue_transformer.md - Task: Audit dialogue tags (90% "said" rule), structure exchanges - Output: Tag corrections and structural recommendations ``` Wait for all agents to complete, then synthesize outputs following priority order: Rhythm → Bathos → Metaphor → Dialogue. ### Step 4: Transform (Multi-Phase) #### Phase A: Opening Apply opening system from `reference/adams_style_guide.md`: - **Cosmic Zoom**: Start at universal scale, crash to trivial - **Mundane Enormity**: Begin with boring detail, reveal cosmic significance - **Authoritative Absurdity**: Guide-entry format with deadpan impossibility #### Phase B: Body Transformation For each paragraph: 1. Identify the "serious point" 2. Elevate its apparent importance 3. Insert digressive tangent (see `reference/digression_systems.md`) 4. Apply bathos formula (see `reference/bathos_patterns.md`) 5. Weave sentence architecture (see `reference/sentence_architecture.md`) #### Phase C: Closing Apply triple-layer Adams closing: - Layer 1: Return to original subject as if nothing absurd occurred - Layer 2: Casual mention of universe-ending implication - Layer 3: Character worrying about tea/towels/bureaucracy ### Step 5: Four-Layer Quality Review (Ultrathink) **This is the critical differentiator: Style fidelity alone produces parody. Originality prevents imitation. Meaning amplification produces excellence.** Run sequentially - each layer feeds the next: #### Layer 1: Style Fidelity Check - Prompt: `prompts/layer1_fidelity_check.md` - Input: First draft from Step 4 - Task: DETECT (not fix) style deviations using corpus-calibrated metrics - Output: Fidelity report with specific flags (target: ≥6/8 checks passed) #### Anti-Cliché Layer (NEW) - Prompt: `prompts/anti_cliche_layer.md` - Input: First draft + Layer 1 report - Task: Detect recycled Adams tropes and insufficient joke depth - Checks: - **BANNED** (0 uses): brick similes, 42, Vogons, Babel fish, "Don't Panic" - **LIMITED** (budget per 2000 words): "not entirely unlike", tea, towels - **"Twist more than once"**: Single-twist jokes flagged for deepening - Output: Anti-Cliché report with replacement recommendations #### Layer 2: Technique Refinement - Prompt: `prompts/layer2_technique_refinement.md` - Input: First draft + Layer 1 report + Anti-Cliché report - Task: Apply SURGICAL corrections + replace clichés with fresh material - Output: Refined text + change log #### Layer 3: Meaning Amplification - Prompt: `prompts/layer3_meaning_amplification.md` - Input: Refined text + original source - Task: Ensure Adams techniques AMPLIFY (not obscure) the message - Output: Final text + amplification report **The Ultrathink Principle:** Every Adams technique must serve the content's truth. Decorative mimicry fails Layer 3. **The "Twist More Than Once" Principle:** Professional analysis notes "Douglas has to twist the line more than once." Single-layer jokes are flagged for deeper work. See `prompts/orchestrator.md` for complete workflow coordination. ### Step 6: Validate **MANDATORY: Run validate_metrics.py after Phase 2 synthesis:** ```bash python scripts/validate_metrics.py --source original.txt --output transformed.txt --json ``` **For long texts (>10,000 words), use chunk_text.py FIRST:** ```bash python scripts/chunk_text.py --input long_source.txt --output-dir chunks/ # Process each chunk through the pipeline # Merge outputs, then run final validation ``` **Script checks (deterministic):** - Word count ratio (60-115% of source) - Banned phrases (Adams quotes, clichés, book report patterns, PowerPoint headers) - Deadpan markers ("in fact"/"of course" density) - Sentence distribution - Exclamation marks (<1 per 2000 words) - Question frequency (8-10 per 1000 words) **Optional: Run validate_adams_style.py for comprehensive final check:** ```bash python scripts/validate_adams_style.py ``` Additional checks: - Bathos presence (varied placement, NOT formulaic intervals) - Digression density (at least 1 tangent per 300 words) - Inverted comparisons ("not like X, but like Y") - Sentence rhythm (30% short ≤10 words, 31% single-sentence paragraphs) - Adams vocabulary markers ("quite"/"rather" > "utterly") - Dialogue tag distribution (90% "said") ### Step 7: Report ``` Transformation Complete **Source Analysis:** - Original style: [formal/journalistic/technical] - Original length: [X words] - Bathos opportunities identified: [Y] **Output Specifications:** - Final length: [X words] - Bathos instances: [N] - Digressions inserted: [M] - Simile inversions: [K] - Validation: [PASS/FAIL with details] **Key Transformations:** 1. [e.g., Converted Q3 earnings report to Vogon poetry analysis] 2. [e.g., Inserted 400-word tangent on digital watches] 3. [e.g., Applied cosmic bathos to meeting agenda] ``` ## CRITICAL: Contextual Mode Detection **Do not apply global averages.** Adams wrote differently in different contexts. Before any transformation, segment text by mode: | Mode | Short Sentences | Tangent Density | Reluctance | |------|-----------------|-----------------|------------| | Guide Entry | 20-25% | LOW | LOW (confident absurdity) | | Narrative Action | 35-40% | MEDIUM | HIGH for Arthur, LOW for Ford | | Philosophical Musing | 15-20% | HIGH (is the tangent) | MEDIUM (weary omniscience) | | Dialogue Scene | 45-55% | LOW | Character-dependent | | Descriptive Passage | 25-30% | MEDIUM-HIGH | MEDIUM (bored by magnificence) | See `reference/contextual_modes.md` for full details. **The Marketing Copy Trap:** AI tends toward efficiency. Adams was gloriously inefficient. If your output moves smoothly A→B→C, you've failed. Adams moved A→tangent→tangent→B. --- ## Corpus-Validated Insights Based on analysis of 528,808 words of authentic Adams text across 10 books: ### Vocabulary (Often Imitated Wrong) **Top Intensifiers:** - "quite" (8.13/10k) and "rather" (6.73/10k) are #1 and #2 - "utterly" is OVERUSED in imitations (only 0.96/10k in real Adams) **Sentence Distribution:** - 30% short (≤10 words) - MORE punchy than commonly assumed - 46% medium (11-30 words) - 15% long (31-50 words) - 8% very long (>50 words) **Questions:** ~9 per 1000 words (high - drives philosophical voice) **Signature "brick simile":** Use sparingly - only 0.15 per 10k words ### Opening Patterns (NEW) | Type | Frequency | Example | |------|-----------|---------| | Cosmic Zoom | 33% | "Far out in the uncharted backwaters..." | | Character Action | 25% | "The regular early morning yell of horror..." | | Philosophical | 17% | "There is a theory which states..." | | Meta-Commentary | 17% | "The history of the Galaxy has got muddled..." | ### Bathos Timing is NOT Formulaic (NEW) Real Adams places first bathos anywhere from **30 words to 2,200 words** into a piece. The variation IS the pattern. Do not apply bathos at fixed intervals. ### Dialogue (NEW) - Use "said" for 90% of dialogue tags - Reserve "burbled" for machines, "rasped/rumbled" for authority figures - ~31.9% of paragraphs are single sentences (use for punchlines) ### Metaphor Patterns (NEW) - 693 comparisons across corpus: 37.5% "like a/the", 28.3% "as if" - Inverted comparisons ("not like X, but like Y") are signature technique - Categories: Mechanical (34%), Animal (28%), Human (22%), Abstract (10%) ### Chapter Endings (NEW) - End with deflation/bathos (35%), dialogue punchline (30%), physical comedy (20%) - Final sentences typically SHORT (3-15 words) - Recurring: "Or so it would seem", "It was that simple" See `reference/literary_analysis.md` for complete analysis and `reference/corpus_analysis_summary.md` for statistics. ## Reference Files ### Agent Prompts (Multi-Layer System) **Phase 0 - Extraction & Fresh Material:** - `prompts/content_extractor.md` - **RUN FIRST** - Extracts key points, sets length targets - `prompts/observation_engine.md` - **NEW** - Generates FRESH observations by questioning assumptions - `prompts/contemporary_adams_vision.md` - **NEW** - 2015-2025 absurdities, modern digital watch equivalents **Phase 1 - Parallel Analysis:** - `prompts/orchestrator.md` - Coordinates entire workflow with parallel agents and 4-layer review - `prompts/bathos_architect.md` - Bathos analysis and insertion (4 patterns, corpus timing) - `prompts/metaphor_engineer.md` - Comparison crafting (5 techniques, domain taxonomy) - `prompts/rhythm_analyst.md` - Sentence/paragraph structure (corpus targets) - `prompts/dialogue_transformer.md` - Dialogue tags and exchange patterns - `prompts/tangent_injector.md` - Tangent insertion using fresh material **Phase 3 - Quality Layers:** - `prompts/layer1_fidelity_check.md` - Style deviation detection (12 checkpoints) - `prompts/anti_cliche_layer.md` - **NEW** - Trope detection, originality verification, "twist more than once" - `prompts/layer2_technique_refinement.md` - Surgical corrections + cliché replacement - `prompts/layer3_meaning_amplification.md` - **ULTRATHINK** - Ensures techniques serve message ### Core References - `reference/contextual_modes.md` - **CRITICAL** - The 5 contextual modes with mode-specific targets (Guide Entry, Narrative, Philosophical, Dialogue, Descriptive) - `reference/original_patterns.md` - **NEW** - 100+ pre-generated Adams-esque patterns (bathos, similes, tangents, etc.) - use instead of recycling Adams' specific jokes - `reference/literary_analysis.md` - Comprehensive literary patterns from 10-book corpus study - `reference/corpus_analysis_summary.md` - Real statistics from Adams corpus - `reference/adams_style_guide.md` - Complete style breakdown with examples - `reference/bathos_patterns.md` - 12 bathos formulas with templates - `reference/sentence_architecture.md` - Adams-specific sentence patterns - `reference/digression_systems.md` - Tangent insertion techniques - `reference/vocabulary_guide.md` - Adams vocabulary, neologisms, phrase patterns ### Scripts **Primary (Integrated into Pipeline):** - `scripts/validate_metrics.py` - **MANDATORY** - Deterministic validation (banned phrases, word counts, deadpan markers). Run after Phase 2, output feeds Phase 3 layers. Use `--json` for programmatic output. - `scripts/chunk_text.py` - **FOR LONG TEXTS** - Splits texts >10,000 words into ~3000-word chunks at natural breaks for parallel processing. **Optional Standalone Tools:** - `scripts/validate_adams_style.py` - Comprehensive style validation (can run independently for final check) - `scripts/bathos_detector.py` - Detect and score anti-climax patterns (exploratory analysis) - `scripts/vocabulary_checker.py` - Check Adams vocabulary markers (exploratory analysis) - `scripts/analyse_corpus.py` - Analyse text for Adams style statistics (reference tool) ### Examples - `examples/news_to_adams.md` - News article transformation - `examples/academic_to_adams.md` - Academic paper transformation - `examples/technical_to_adams.md` - Technical doc transformation ### Templates - `templates/guide_entry.md` - Hitchhiker's Guide entry format - `templates/chapter_opening.md` - Novel chapter opening format - `templates/cosmic_zoom.md` - Universal-to-trivial structure ## Output Requirements **Must include:** - Bathos instances (vary placement - NOT at fixed intervals, range 30-2200 words to first) - At least 1 digressive tangent per 300 words - At least 1 inverted comparison ("not like X, but like Y") per 500 words - Mode-appropriate short sentence percentage (see contextual modes) - ~31% single-sentence paragraphs for rhythm and punchlines - Use "quite"/"rather" NOT "utterly" for intensification - Use "said" for 90% of dialogue tags **Originality Requirements (v0.9.0 EXPANDED):** - 0 BANNED Adams tropes (brick similes, 42, Vogons, Babel fish, "Don't Panic", whale/petunias) - 0 VERBATIM Adams openings ("Far out in the uncharted backwaters...", "In the beginning the Universe was created...") - 0 Book report constructions ("the letter mentions", "the author argues", "in the article") - 0 PowerPoint headers (ALL CAPS section breaks - use narrative bridges instead) - LIMITED tropes within budget (max 1 "not entirely unlike" per 2000 words) - ≥70% of jokes must have multiple twists ("twist more than once") - Fresh observations from Observation Engine, not recycled Adams material - Contemporary (2015-2025) references where relevant **Length:** 60% to 115% of source (target: 100-110%) - Below 60%: Content has been lost - FAIL - 100-110%: Ideal (preserved content + Adams additions) - Above 115%: Review for over-tangenting **Content Coverage:** ≥90% of source key points must appear in output - HIGH importance points: 100% required (non-negotiable) - MEDIUM importance points: 85%+ required - Layer 3 verifies coverage before approval **Format:** Markdown (or HTML using appropriate template) **Endings:** Short final sentence (3-15 words), deflation or dialogue punchline --- **Invocation:** Provide source text and say "Adamise this", "Douglas Adams style", or "make this absurd" - skill auto-detects from context. **Modes:** "plan only" for strategy preview, "validate only" to check existing text, "guide entry" for Hitchhiker's format specifically. --- ## Audio Output (Optional) Generate audio narration of Adamised text using ElevenLabs v3: ```bash ELEVENLABS_API_KEY="sk_da5157040e6b27a7d1eb9f73ab2b2891aaead490991d2bcf" curl -X POST "https://api.elevenlabs.io/v1/text-to-speech/oaGwHLz3csUaSnc2NBD4" \ -H "xi-api-key: $ELEVENLABS_API_KEY" \ -H "Content-Type: application/json" \ -d '{"text": "YOUR_ADAMISED_TEXT", "model_id": "eleven_v3"}' \ --output adamised_audio.mp3 ``` **Voice:** Boris (`oaGwHLz3csUaSnc2NBD4`) **Model:** `eleven_v3` (most expressive - sighs, laughs, whispers) For long texts, split into chunks <5000 characters and concatenate audio files.